Physically, mentally, and emotionally tired.

Do you ever feel like you just want to leave everything here and going somewhere?Life is getting too hard. School makes me prepare for my future but left no space for my present. All I want to do is laying for couple hours and not worry about a single damn thing. And there's something else bothering my mind. Him. I need him to be here with me, and tell me that everything is gonna be alright. Is that too much to ask for?



PS: I always think of you in every single time you're not here.

All Too Well - Taylor Swift

I walked through the door with you It was cold, but something ‘bout it felt like home somehow and I Left my scarf there at your sister’s house And you still got it in your drawer even now Oh your sweet disposition And my wide eyed gaze We’re singing in a car getting lost upstate The Autumn leaves falling down like pieces in their place And I can picture it after all these days And I know it’s long gone, and that magic´s not here no more And it might be okay, but I’m not fine at all Cause here we are again on that little town street You almost ran the red cause you were looking over me Wind in my hair I was there I remember it all too well Photo album on my counter Your cheeks were turning red You used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin size bed And your mother’s telling stories ‘bout you on the t-ball team You tell me about your past thinking your future was me And I know it’s long gone, and there was nothing else I could do And I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to Cause here we are again in the middle of the night We’re dancing round the kitchen in the refrigerator light Down the stairs I was there I remember it all too well And maybe we got lost in translation Maybe I asked for too much But maybe this thing was a masterpiece ´til you tore it all up Running scared, I was there I remember it all too well Hey you called me up again just to break me like a promise So casually cruel in the name of being honest I’m a crumbled up piece of paper lying here Cause I remember it all all all too well Time won’t fly it’s like I’m paralyzed by it I´d like to be my old self again But I’m still trying to find it After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone But your keep my old scarf from that very first week Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me You can’t get rid of it, cause you remember it all too well yeah Cause there we are again when I loved you so Back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known It was where, I was there, I remember it all too well Wind in my hair you were there you remember it all Down the stairs you were there you remember it all It was where, I was there I remember it all too well

Memories

Aku masih inget hari pertama dan terakhir kita bertemu, waktu itu hari pertamaku masuk ke kelas bimbel dan ternyata tanggal 23 juli 2011 itu hari keberuntunganku karena bisa bertemu kamu. Dan hari berikutnya adalah hari-hari paling menyenangkan dalam hidupku :') Kamu adalah motivasiku untuk belajar, motivasiku untuk jadi lebih baik lagi. see? aku berhasil membuktikannya kan? itu untuk kamu, meskipun kamu ga akan pernah tau

You never asked so I never told. Aku lupa hari apa, tapi itu hari yang menyakitkan. waktu aku tahu dia juga suka sama kamu. Putus asa. Harapanku padamu sudah habis saat itu. Aku hanya bisa menatapmu dalam diam. Tidak berkata apa-apa. Tidak berbuat apa-apa. Dan betul apa yang mereka bilang; in the end you only regret the chances you didn't take. Yang jadi penyesalanku adalah aku belum sempat mengatakannya. Tapi aku tidak akan pernah menyesal mengenalmu :)

Dan datanglah saat itu. Saat hari terakhir kita bertemu; 22 april 2012. Sehari sebelum ujian nasional, saat mengambil kelas tambahan di hari minggu. Sudah kukatakan sebelumnya kan? Kamu adalah motivasiku untuk belajar. Terimakasih untuk waktumu 1 tahun ini, yang mungkin tak akan berarti apa-apa untukmu. Karena memang tidak ada apa-apa. Aku rajin menahan untuk tidak mengungkapkan, meskipun menyakitkan. sehat-sehatlah dalam kesibukanmu :)

Untuk segala rasa yang belum tentu kaurasakan, untuk segala rindu yang tak pernah kau tahu; aku masih menunggu. Entah menunggu untuk apa, dan menunggu sampai kapan. Aku akan selalu berdoa untukmu. Untuk kesuksesanmu, kesehatanmu dan untuk semuanya.

Autumn

*sayangnyadisinigaadamusimgugur* *nangisdipojokan*

Ronan - Taylor Swift

I remember your bare feet down the hallway

I remember your little laugh
Race cars on the kitchen floor, plastic dinosaurs
I love you to the moon and back

I remember your blue eyes looking into mine
Like we had our own secret club
I remember you dancing before bed time
Then jumping on me, waking me up

I can still feel you hold my hand, little man
And even the moment I knew
You fought it hard like an army guy
Remember I leaned in and whispered to you

Come on baby with me we're gonna fly away from here
You were my best four years

I remember the drive home
When the blind hope turned to crying and screaming "Why?"
Flowers pile up in the worst way, no one knows what to say
About a beautiful boy who died

And it's about to be halloween
You could be anything you wanted if you were still here
I remember the last day when I kissed your face
I whispered in your ear

Come on baby with me we're gonna fly away from here
Out of this curtain room and this hospital grey, we'll just disappear
Come on baby with me we're gonna fly away from here
You were my best four years

What if I'm standing in your closet trying to talk to you?
What if I kept the hand-me-downs you won't grow into?
And what if I really thought some miracle would see us through?
What if the miracle was even getting one moment with you?

Come on baby with me we're gonna fly away from here
Come on baby with me we're gonna fly away from here
You were my best four years

I remember your bare feet down the hallway
I love you to the moon and back :)

Make You Feel My Love - Adele

When the rain is blowing in your face,
And the whole world is on your case,
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make you feel my love.

When the evening shadows and the stars appear,
And there is no one there to dry your tears,
I could hold you for a million years
To make you feel my love.

I know you haven't made your mind up yet,
But I would never do you wrong.
I've known it from the moment that we met,
No doubt in my mind where you belong.

I'd go hungry; I'd go black and blue,
I'd go crawling down the avenue.
No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love.

The storms are raging on the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret.
Though winds of change are blowing wild and free,
You ain't seen nothing like me yet.

I could make you happy, make your dreams come true.
Nothing that I wouldn't do.
Go to the ends of the Earth for you,
To make you feel my love
To make you feel my love 

Adele - Someone Like You

I heard that you're settled down
That you found a girl and you're married now.
I heard that your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.

Old friend, why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light.

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead, "
Yeah

You'd know how the time flies
Only yesterday was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I'd hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead"
Yeah

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead"

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,


"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead, "

thinking of you - katy perry

thinking of you - katy perry

Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one
I still got the seed
You said move on
Where do I go
I guess second best
Is all I will know

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes

You're like an Indian summer
In the middle of winter
Like a hard candy
With a surprise center
How do I get better
Once I've had the best
You said there's
Tons of fish in the water
So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips
I taste your mouth
He pulled me in
I was disgusted with myself

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into...

You're the best
And yes I do regret
How I could let myself
Let you go
Now the lesson's learned
I touched it I was burned
Oh I think you should know


Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes
Looking into your eyes

Looking into your eyes
Oh won't you walk through

And take me away
Oh no more mistakes
Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay...
stay....